And On The Eighth Day..

Evening came, and morning followed. The Eighth day.

Lord woke up from his sleep and yawned. "It was a busy week", he thought. Six days of creation, and a day of recreation that followed. Oh boy, it was fun while it lasted. But its over. What shall I do now..? Hmm.. I think Ill check on Adam and Eve."

He got out of his bed, stretched, yawned again, and set out for Eden Gardens. He looked at the Eden Gardens from a distance, and bemused how good it was. "You did an awesome job, dude.", He patted his own back.

He was strolling through the Eden Gardens, appreciating His own sense of beauty, congratulating himself, when He saw a snake crawling around. He realized how ugly it looked, and noticed it had neither hands, nor legs. By reflex, he took it in his hands and looked for the "Made in China" mark. Unable to find any, He sighed, laughed at this minute manufacturing error he had committed, and noted it down in his iPhone under "Bugs to be fixed".

But then he felt the vibes that something was not right. He could feel His Eighth sense working. (Yes, Thank you. I can count. He has eight senses. He is the Lord, you fool..! )

It was then that He realized both Adam and Eve where nowhere to be seen.

They were missing...!

"Where could they have gone?", He looked around. Then He thought, "Oh boy, this is embarassing. I must be getting too old for this job. I almost even forgot I have an Xray vision."

He switched it on, looked around, and found Adam and Eve hiding behind a tree.

Lord smiled to Himself, and in a playful mood, went around the tree to face them and exclaimed., "Gotcha..!"

Adam was startled, as he hadn't expected The Lord to find him so soon.

But he wasnt the only one who was surprised.

The Lord stood aghast watching Adam wearing a  Scullers Tshirt and a Denim jeans. Eve was wearing a green jeans and top which had 'Who’s your Daddy' printed on it.

"You ate from the Tree of Good and Bad, didnt you..?", asked the Lord, angry and taken aback at this sudden display of style.

Eve noticed the change in the Lord's manner, suddenly shifting from the playful to the most serious of moods, felt the tense situation worsen, and suddenly improvised.

Eve said, "It was the snake..!", and she started weeping.

Even she hadnt the faintest idea what that meant.

"Is this the best excuse you can come up with, you dumbass.? We are finished.", thought Adam desperately.

But there was one thing to it that made it all seem plausible. One super natural power that no living being can possibly comprehend.

The power of a woman's tears when it comes to convincing someone..!

"Oh.. Aint all the women alike. Here comes the routine blah blah..", sighed The Lord.

Eve took a wipe, and continued.

"It was the snake, my Lord. It was his speech that coaxed us into eating the fruit."

Adam felt his jaw striking his chest as his mouth gaped hearing this sudden and senseless rant.

But, by the power of the same mysterious supernatural force, The Lord felt sorry for them, took out His iPhone, and deleted the snake's name from the 'Bugs to be fixed' list.
"He deserves what he got.", thought the Lord.

Soon after The Lord left, Adam and Eve decided to spend the night celebrating what was a narrow and seemingly impossible escape. "Play some music..!" said a jovial Adam. They danced, ate and drank.

It wasnt any late when Eve got drunk and said, "I said a Snake spoke to me.. And He believed that. LOL.!"

Eve started rolling on the floor laughing. And Adam noticed it could be acronymed to 'ROFL', and noted it down for future use.

But amidst all this joyous burst, one thing escaped their notice.

A tiny blinking red light watching them, a CCTV camera, hidden among the trees.

The Lord sat in His study watching all this in the LCD screen before Him, His face burning red with hatred.
He thought about the most imaginative and innovative ways to punish them.

For Eve, He Googled for the most vulnerable point in her life, found labor pains, and raised the pain levels 3 fold. He wasnt finished. He hacked into her facebook profile, and changed her status from  'free' to 'forever dependent on man'.
"Take that.!", He said.

(The rest is history that this eventually led to the evolution of a dumber, and more aggressive subspecies of women who named themselves 'feminists'.)

And for Adam, The Lord said "Free food is over. Get your bread from the sweat of your forehead."

Adam couldn’t grasp what The Lord meant. Seeing him standing perplexed, The Lord let out a sigh, and explained, "Child, Haven’t you heard., 'You just dont get a Bournville. You earn it.'..? Similar stuff.
And to the both of you, Don’t ever step foot inside Eden again..!"

And that was how Man fell.

Evening came. Morning will follow. The Eighth day ended.